Barbies and You: A Smidgen of Truth

I heard that little American girls grow up to look like their first Barbie doll.

My first Barbie was an FOB (friend of Barbie) named Midge. She was made of the hard, putty-colored plastic Matel used before the twist and turn Barbie was born. Barbie abandoned Midge in short order and found better friends, ones who could twist and turn and look cool riding in Barbie's convertible.

What kind of name is Midge, anyway? At least I don't look anything like her.