The Amazing Race 14 Switzerland

Season 14 of The Amazing Race assembles eleven easy-to-pigeonhole duos.
This season's mandatory blondes are flight attendants who assume their advantage is in their blondeness. The other unattached female team is bottle redheads, former NFL cheerleaders. They prove they are ready for the physical challenges with a few cartwheels in the intro. Couple Preston and Jennifer reveal themselves to be this season's fighting couple with the first words out of their mouths.
The show's producers always include a surprise team or two. This season's unlikely pairs include mother and son, Margie and Luke. Luke is profoundly deaf and cannot read lips, so he is completely dependent on his mother's sign language. The other unlikely team is a pair of tiny stuntman. Mark and Michael work as stunt doubles for kid actors and look rock solid. They are my out-of-the gate favorites.
Sibling teams tend to be strong teams. This season's sibs are sister athletes, Lakisha and Jennifer, and Harvard-bred lawyers, brother Victor and sister Tammy.

Locarno, Switzerland

The eleven teams fly to either Zurich or Milan, then take a train to Locarno, Switzerland. A train trip after a flight is an unusual wrench--how do you calculate which route is fastest? I smell problems ahead when Jennifer (of the fighting duo) says, "I've never in my life been to a train station."
Trains figure signficantly in this leg of the race.
Blonde flight attendants switch to an express train with the help of a local woman. Other teams gape out the window as they watch the blondes get off the train. This turns out to be their last smart move of the leg.
Once in Locarno, teams head to the Church of San Antonio where a priest gives teams directions to their overnight campsite. Teams bunch up into three morning departure times, 15 minutes apart. The campsite is rough; mosquitoes are visible in the camera lens.
Sitting around the campfire, the two self-described hillbillies, Steve and Linda, are already fighting. "You're just slow and there ain't a damn thing we can do about it," Steve says. Linda cries. The hillbillies' selection to the show is a surprise. They are older; she is slow and overweight.
Typically, when a team has a major deficiency, like a physical handicap or age disadvantage, they also have a redeeming quality that gives them a fighting chance. Sometimes the advantage is just that they get along. Compatibility should not be underestimated in The Amazing Race.
Steve and Linda don't seem to have an upside. She moves like a turtle and sounds asthmatic.

Verzasca Dam

In the morning, with just a photo as guidance, teams race to Verzasca Dam, the site of the second highest bungee jump in the world.
The stuntmen are in their glory. The phrase "omigod" is said over and over by everyone, but the most fearful racer is Jodi, the blonde flight attendant. The camera catches many shots of her worried face; she does most of her flying in planes.
Despite their nervousness, the bungee jumpers all register gleeful expressions on the way down. Jodi's expression is more neutral, but no longer worried.
Teams must now take a taxi and then catch a train to Interlaken.
In the cab, Hillbilly Linda asks "can you go fast, but follow the speed limits?" This caution can lose them the race. Now I am doubly certain they will be the first team eliminated.
Here the racing order changes as the train that leaves earlier arrives much later and puts the flight attendants dead last.

Cheese, Glorious Cheese

In Kleine Rugen Weiss, teams must carry antique cheese racks uphill and transport 200 pounds of cheese downhill. Each cheese wheel weighs fifty pounds.
Runaway cheese wheels and crumbling racks are the name of this game. Swiss drummers pound irritating metal drums and laugh hysterically at the racers. The cheese challenge is just cruel.
Lawyer bro Victor tries to takes two wheels at once, but his transport breaks. Mel, one of the old guys, schooches on this butt with his cheese wheel, reminding me of a cat with an itchy ass.
Steve says "We didn't get here by being idiots." Steve surprises me and proves he is not an idiot. He and Linda were the next-to-last team to reach the cheese, but the most innovative in getting the cheese down the hill. I don't think anyone was successful in taking two wheels down at once, but Steve managed three at a time.
The hillbillies move from tenth to sixth.
In Stechelberg, teams must listen for a group of yodelers who will lead them to the pit stop. Finding the Yodelers is harder than it sounds. Their noise (and I mean noise) bounces off the mountains.
Two teams pass Steve and Linda as they have more trouble finding the yodelers than most teams. But they finish an admirable ninth. I still believe they will be the next team eliminated, but I'm glad my first impression was wrong.
This season's Bickersons are eliminated first, and I am glad. I find nothing entertaining in couples fighting. In their post-elimination statement, Jennifer says the race was destined to make or break their relationship. Based on the lovey-dovey post interview, the race may have improved their relationship for now. But if they lasted another leg or two, they would have been Splitsville for sure.
Margie and Luke, mother and deaf son, finish first. Phil poignantly signs to Luke. Luke says people think deaf people can't do anything, but he is racing to prove them wrong. His comment elicits a few sniffles from the crowd.