Carmel Valley: An Evening on the Balcony

Gene and I decide to drive into Carmel to buy some wine after we check the prices on the room-service wine list. We laugh at the $25 charge to remove the mini bar.

We spot a Safeway grocery store about one minute after pulling off the Carmel Valley Ranch property and decide we’ve driven far enough. California grocery stores are loaded with wine and we buy four local bottles. Seems like a lot, but Gene likes red; I drink white. Neither of us can pick a single bottle, so we take one nice bottle and one splurge bottle each. We select some cheeses and fresh made salsa.

Back in our quarters, I find scribbled song lyrics stashed in a coffee table book. Judging by the handwriting, I think the composer is a frustrated seven- or eight-year-old kid. “Bad Baby Song” has hit potential.

Our mood is lifted. We enjoy the Jacuzzi tub in the enormous bathroom. The bathroom is larger than some New York living spaces. It has a double sink, a vanity, a separate shower and a walk-in closet.

Padding around the suite in the lodge’s soft white robes, we order salmon and filet mignon from room service. The meals arrive, driven to us in a golf wagon. All the Carmel Valley Ranch employees drive the grounds in golf carts.

We set up a spread on the balcony, with our wine and cheeses and our room-service entrees. We bring out the candle from the bathroom and the iHome from the bedroom.

Gene sets up a playlist with California tunes and San Francisco/LA bands. Some of the songs:

• “99 Miles from LA,” Art Garfunkel
• “The Virgin” Gene Clark
• “Sin City,” The Flying Burrito Brothers
• “California Dreaming,” The Mamas and the Papas

We enjoy our warm California night on the balcony with good wine, good music and great conversation.

Carmel Valley Ranch

When researching hotels, restaurants and vacation activities, sometimes I imagine the places all wrong. That’s what happened when I booked Carmel Valley Ranch.

According to “36 Hours in Carmel-by-the-Sea,” Carmel Valley Ranch is home to one of the most outstanding restaurants in the area, Citronelle. The lure of an exquisite, romantic meal enticed me to look into staying at the 400-acre Carmel Valley Ranch. Their 650-square-foot suite and two heated swimming pools for $138 sealed the deal.

I did not comprehend how far Citronelle and CVR are from the town of Carmel. If I had known, I might have opted to stay in town to visit the shops and Clint Eastwood’s Hog’s Breath Inn.

Never assume, as I did, a restaurant will be open on Monday nights. I call Citronelle belatedly to make a reservation and got the bad news. I also assumed a 400-acre ranch would have at least one more restaurant. Strike two.

As a New Yorker who cannot visualize 400 acres, I did not consider I might have to drive to either pool or the fitness center or the lounge that serves a limited, casual version of the fine-dining experience we hoped to have. A non-New Yorker may not understand our aversion to non-essential driving.

These conditions also make driving into the real Carmel for dinner an unviable option. So we will not do Carmel on this trip. Santa Cruz and Monterey were merely pit stops because I envisioned dropping our bags at our lodging and then checking out Carmel before the loveliest dinner of our trip. Realizing all this upon checking in, surrounded by the beautiful Carmel Valley, I feel bummed out.

But traveling is about adjusting itineraries and ratcheting expectations up or down. Traveling is about making lemonade when necessary. I ponder all this as I slump in a chair on our balcony that overlooks lush green hills.

I always have wanted a balcony in New York and tonight I have one. Here’s our lemonade.